Understanding the Barriers: What Mothers Returning to Work Are Really Up Against
- Kick On Recruitment
- 2 hours ago
- 6 min read
When businesses talk about skills shortages, unfilled roles and retention challenges, there is a highly capable talent pool often being overlooked: mothers returning to work.
Not because they lack experience.
Not because they lack ambition.
But because modern working structures have not kept pace with the realities many families now face.
Data from the Office for National Statistics (ONS) shows motherhood continues to have a substantial and long-lasting impact on women’s earnings and career progression, driven less by ability and more by how work is designed.
For employers, understanding these barriers is not simply about fairness. It is about recruitment, retention and accessing a skilled workforce many businesses urgently need.
In this blog, we are going to go through some of the main challenges mums returning to work may face and how employers could implement strategies to help.
Confidence Erosion After Career Breaks
One of the biggest challenges returning mothers face is a loss of confidence.
After time away from the workplace, many mums:
Question their relevance
Undersell their experience
Worry they have fallen behind
Feel pressure to prove commitment
This confidence dip is often reinforced by financial reality. ONS data shows mothers experience their largest earnings losses in the first year after childbirth, when they are far more likely than fathers to take extended parental leave.
That early disruption can shape how women see their professional value for years, even when their skills remain strong and relevant.
The Financial Reality Behind Returning to Work
The earnings impact of motherhood is both significant and long-lasting.
According to the ONS:
Five years after their first child, mothers earn on average £1,051 per month less than they did before childbirth.
After a second child, earnings remain £313 per month lower five years later.
After a third child, earnings are still £689 per month lower.
Cumulatively, the total loss in earnings over five years is estimated at:
£65,618 after a first child
£26,317 after a second child
£32,456 after a third child
These reductions rarely occur because women lose ability or ambition. Instead, they stem from structural and practical pressures, including:
Returning part-time due to childcare costs or availability
Moving into lower-responsibility roles to gain flexibility
Pausing progression opportunities
Changing roles to secure family-friendly hours
Taking further career breaks following additional children
These decisions are often necessary to balance family and finances but they carry long-term impacts on earnings and career development.
For many families, these financial realities directly influence whether returning to work is viable at all.
Childcare: Where the Numbers Stop Adding Up
Childcare remains one of the biggest and most misunderstood barriers to returning to work.
While funded childcare hours exist, they rarely cover the true cost of care, particularly in private nursery settings.
Average UK childcare costs (National Day Nurseries Association and sector surveys) show:
Full-time nursery care typically costs £200–£400+ per week, depending on location.
Childminders are often slightly cheaper, averaging £180–£320 per week, though availability varies.
Even with funded hours, families still pay around £110–£120+ per week for additional unfunded hours.
Funded hours also:
Are term-time only
Rarely align with full working days - full time working hours exceed the 30 free childcare hours
Exclude meals and consumables
Do not usually cover early starts or late finishes
The result? Many families still face substantial monthly childcare bills, at the same time earnings may have dropped following childbirth.
For some, returning to work simply doesn’t add up financially.
The Invisable Pressure: The Mental Load Mothers Carry
Mums don’t just juggle physical tasks, they carry the invisible mental effort of keeping family life running. This is often called the “mental load” - the constant planning, reminding, anticipating and organising that never stops, even outside work hours.
Research shows that mothers manage a vast majority of this cognitive household work. In one large study, mothers reported handling about 71% of all mental load tasks including scheduling, organising activities, planning meals and tracking family needs, compared to much lower shares for fathers.
This isn’t about doing more chores, it’s about constant cognitive labour that can contribute to:
Decision fatigue
Stress
Burnout
Reduced mental energy available for paid work
Lower psychological well-being when it’s ongoing and unsupported
These mental demands don’t magically disappear when a child is in school or during a workday. They run in the background of everyday life, ready to take over if something is forgotten or a schedule changes unexpectedly.
At the same time, research into brain changes associated with pregnancy and motherhood shows that the brain reorganises itself to prioritise caregiving and social-attentional networks. This is not evidence of “loss of ability,” but rather a restructuring that supports maternal bonding and multitasking. It can feel like reduced cognitive bandwidth for dense, singular tasks in the short term.
All of this contributes to the sheer psychological pressure many returning mothers describe and can make the transition back into work more than just a practical challenge. It’s about navigating a constant, underlying mental effort that doesn’t pause when the working day begins.
Why This Matters to Employers
Mums returning to work aren’t just adjusting their schedules, they are readjusting a cognitive system that’s been rewired by years of 24/7 planning and problem-solving. When employers recognise this, they can better support performance and retention.
Signs employers might notice include:
Difficulty concentrating under tight deadlines
Feeling mentally “overloaded” or fatigued earlier in the day
Increased stress during transitions or shifting priorities
Reluctance to take on complex multi-step tasks until confidence rebuilds
These are not signs of incompetence, they are human responses to high cognitive demand and mental load.
Rigid Working Structures Compund the Problem
When roles are offered with little flexibility, mothers are often forced into difficult trade-offs:
Accepting roles below their capability
Reducing hours long-term
Declining opportunities entirely
Leaving the workforce
Campaign group Pregnant Then Screwed describes the motherhood penalty as largely avoidable, driven not by lack of ambition but by systems failing to support working parents effectively.
Unconscious Bias Still Plays a Role
Alongside structural challenges, many mothers encounter quiet assumptions during hiring:
That flexibility equals reduced commitment
That childcare affects reliability
That ambition has lessened
In reality, supported returning mothers are often among the most organised, efficient and motivated employees in a workplace.
Final Thoughts for Employers: Turning Understanding Into Action
Mothers returning to work are not lacking in capability or ambition, but they are often navigating structural, financial and psychological pressures that workplaces have not fully adapted to.
For employers, supporting returning mothers does not require large-scale policy change. Often, it is small, practical adjustments that remove unnecessary barriers and unlock valuable talent.
Supporting Confidence After Career Breaks
Many returning mothers experience reduced confidence despite strong experience and transferable skills.
Employers can help by:
Focusing on capability and potential, not career gaps
Offering supportive onboarding or phased returns
Encouraging skills refresh or training opportunities
Reinforcing that flexibility does not equal reduced commitment
Confidence often rebuilds quickly when people feel supported rather than judged.
Addressing Financial Pressure Around Childcare
Childcare costs frequently determine whether returning to work is financially worthwhile.
Employers can support by:
Offering flexible start and finish times aligned with childcare availability
Considering hybrid or remote working where possible
Allowing compressed hours or adjusted working patterns
Being open to part-time or phased returns before increasing hours
Small scheduling flexibility can make the difference between a mother returning or leaving the workforce entirely.
Recognising the Mental Load and Default Parent Pressue
Many mothers carry the majority of household planning and childcare coordination, becoming the “default parent” alongside paid work.
Employers can help by:
Providing clear priorities and expectations
Avoiding unnecessary last-minute scheduling changes
Allowing flexibility during unexpected childcare issues
Encouraging open conversations around workload pressures
When mental load pressure is recognised, performance and engagement improve.
Challenging Bias and Assumptions in Hiring
Assumptions about commitment or reliability can quietly disadvantage returning mothers.
Employers should:
Avoid linking flexibility with lack of ambition
Focus interviews on skills and performance
Judge output, not physical presence
Ensure hiring managers understand the realities of modern working parents
Many returning mothers are among the most motivated and loyal hires when given the opportunity.
Businesses that actively support working parents benefit through:
Improved retention
Reduced recruitment costs
More diverse and resilient teams
Access to experienced talent pools
This is not about lowering standards. It is about removing unnecessary friction that prevents capable people from contributing fully.
In conclusion, the motherhood penalty is not inevitable. It is largely shaped by how work is structured.
Employers who adapt gain access to skilled professionals eager to return, contribute and grow with their organisations.
In a competitive hiring market, that understanding is not simply compassionate.
It is commercially smart
A Final Thought for Mums Returning to Work
If you are preparing to return to work, the transition can feel daunting but practical choices can make it easier.
Consider:
Exploring all childcare options. Childminders can often be significantly cheaper than private nurseries and offer more flexible hours.
Running the numbers before accepting a role, including childcare and travel costs.
Not underselling yourself. Career breaks build valuable transferable skills.
Asking about flexibility early - many employers are open to it.
Considering phased returns or part-time starts to rebuild confidence.
Seeking employers who genuinely understand working parents.
Returning to work is not starting again, it is simply the next stage of your career.
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